Jared Shaw sighting...please no

$kala is making some noise about coming back to MMA. He generally talks out of his ass, and this is no exception.

On a personal level, I think I took on a lot of blame that (shouldn’t necessarily) have been pointed in my direction. I certainly had my faults like anybody else. There was a lot to deal with, being 28 years old at the time, it’s a lot just to understand as you grow up,” he said.

28? You're "growing up" at 28? You spoiled fucking prick. Fuck you. I was the father of an 8 year old when I was 28. You know what I was doing? Being a GOD DAMNED GROWN UP you overfed, undertalented cockpolisher. Go back to hanging off daddy's massive teat and leave the hard work to people who don't need to "grow up".

more TUF

I'm fast forwarding through the man-drama. don't care. Dan Henderson looks like a non-inspirational coach. Bitchy jocks whining at each other makes me want to puke.

Evans-Machida spots: awesome. Square butts Burger King spots? Diarrhea-inducing.

Good god...all those guys are there for themselves. None of them are there for their teams. Bisping saying "there's no egos on our team" is fucking stupid. They're ALL ego. that they can put it aside for a little while doesn't mean they're free of ego.

Damarques vs. Dean. Dean calls out "there'll be some black on black crime!" Damarques is as black as Barack. Which is to say, not very.

How fucking hard are they trying to make Bisping not look like a moron? Notice they're only showing Bisping looking smart? Dean looks a lot like Dave Chapelle, but not interesting. Damarques is one of the guys I liked going in. He sounds like Forrest Griffin. Oy, pray monkey. Gross. These guys must all pray to Old Testament god. Jesus isn't down with punching faces in. Just saying.

Martin has a horrible ear. Oh tension, no Bisping.

Rampage/Sadollah mini-interview. Rampage says he howls because he was a big fan of Teen Wolf.

The "Guy's Choice Awards" on Spike awards "The Mantlers".

Well here we go. Tough matchup for Dean. Damarques is fast as shit. Damarques' kimura was close...triangle. Jeez how many times did they warn him? Mismatch. Damarques has to be a bit of a favorite now, along with Winner. Dean looked like he had zero idea what to do about Damarques' ground game, though. If Damarques learns to sprawl a little bit better...ah who am I kidding, it wasn't long enough to know what's what.


OH! And Dean officially Pulls a Wang. Gotta love it.

TUF ep 4

typical start, recapping the last ep

they're trying desperately to setup the "UK is a TEAM! US int!" angle, but honestly who gives a shit? You think those UK guys won't beat the living hell out of each other? What are they united by, a common hatred of arabs?

first fight andre winner, who impressed me in the UK qualifier, vs. santino, who should have been TKOd in his qualifier.

man just showing the warmup I hope Santino doesn't fight like that. His chin has a "hit here" sign hanging off it.

Its pretty effed up how soon after qualifying US has to fight.

they talk about "octagon jitters"...i think we get that in TUF as well as on the UFN's and PPV's. some guys just look intimidated, more by cameras than the crowd I'd imagine.

BTW, what was up with Running Bitch Bisping's paperwork in previous eps? He said his visa or whatever wasn't lined up...what's with that? did he show up with a bunch of heroin balloons up his ass? Curious minds want to know.

Oh that chin is up high...weird leg kicks from Winner, they're like with his foot, not his shin...Winner is A LOT faster...santino pulls guard? santino's ground game is OK off his back...or not, TKO for Winner. Winner is just better. Santino had no chance. Winner was really playing it safe.

Banned! I won't make any lame shirts. Maybe

Dear Luke Thomas: I knew you had no balls. You'll ban, then act like you're a media outlet (you're clearly just another blog, albeit a big one), rather than take any criticism at all, you huge douche. The irony is that the post I was reading when I realized I'd been banned was one where Thomas retardedly calls Kevin Randleman's bizarre rant "brave". Randleman also states he's "not Rampage. I'll go to jail for beating this guy's ass" (as if it was one person who said that, and not thousands of folks opining)...A) Why the sudden shot on Rampage? and 2) is it fearlessness or fucking stupidity? It's nor fearless to go, in a situation where it's CLEARLY not merited (ie NOT IN COMBAT), fucking nuts and hurt someone who is obviously no match for you (unless it was 'Page blogging), it's sociopathic. So, Luke Thomas loves sociopaths, and people who want to hurt others smaller than themselves. Of course, he was a Marine at some point, so that makes it all right. I guess.

That gets me back to the fact that Thomas was writing about bravery when he clearly left his own back in the Corps. Well, in honor of being banned (it's hard to make new accounts, I know), I'll say this:



Also, to be clear: Kevin Randleman's talk about beating people up who talk about him is stupid, disgusting, and makes everyone in MMA look a little more like idiotic street thugs. I guess 'roids stay in there fucking your brain up longer than anyone knew, huh Monster? What, he's going to beat me up? At least it'll be FOR something, rather than just a random steroid freakout where he imagines I'm a goblin eating his foot or some shit. So, good work Kevin. Good job representing your sport. If we do meet, I'll eventually (I hope) get out of the hospital, but you'll never get out of jail.

Add: Commenter on the Fighthype post puts it perfect:

Now Mr. Randalmen is upset because someone wrote a critical article about him because he dodged a tough opponent. He'll whip the reporters ass, and the fans' ass and on and on. He should have been concentrating on whooping Feijao's ass and he wouldn't have been perceived as such a pussy in the first place. You get paid to get punched in the face Randlemen!!! Quit your bitchin and stop dodging fights!!

Can you say pwned?

another guy who's blown it

Mr. War "John 'War Machine' Koppenhaver" Machine fought over the weekend for UWC, and won a hard-fought battle against a pretty game Reshad Woods.
Of course, WJWMKM shouldn't be fighting game-but-likely-overmatched guys in regional promotions, despite the fact that it's a pretty damn good regional promotion. He blew his shot at the UFC with his diva attitude and diva idiocy. While I'm not anywhere near saying Mr. WJWMKM is worthy of being in the top twenty at 170, he's shown a lot of heart (if no gas tank) in his fights, and considerable courage. So his tumble from the big stage would have been sad if it wasn't so fucking self-inflicted.

Diaz-Smith for Strikeforce?

Five Ounces of Pain is reporting Diaz-Smith for an upcoming Strikeforce card, possibly at a catchweight of 179lbs.
I say, fight at 185. It won't help the fight to have Smith need to cut an extra 6lbs two months after he last fought.
But given their recent results, an intriguing matchup. This would be a solid challenge for a Nick Diaz who seemingly can only be beaten by the bong, and a Scott Smith with a Jaw of Steel.

Fluff and garbage

I know it's slow MMA-news-wise right now, but can we have some stories that aren't just fluff and garbage? I feel I've been hatin' a little hard lately so I won't link right to them, but MAN have some MMA articles sucked lately! Even outside of rhymes-with-Flerdog's normal terrible writing, I've seen some horrible fluff pieces along the lines of "I just lifted two paragraphs from someone's biography, now I'll spend one more fellating them! Submit!" There's a "What if..." article out right now that simply repeats "What if this happened?" or "What if that happened?" and offers exactly zero insight or analysis. That's not an article!
Oh MMA sites, please, please take some editorial control here! Content doesn't consist of asking a question, but of trying to answer it! Even if the answer is "I'm not sure", it's better than absolutely nothing.